A schnorrer is someone who not only appreciates getting something for nothing, he feels entitled to it.  He’s the guy who grabs the last french fry from a communal plate, dines off of supermarket tastings, and asks for senior citizen discounts right after being bar mitzvahed.

Be honest.  Who amongst us has not enjoyed, indeed, reveled in getting something for nothing?  Who hasn’t run the table at a smorgosboard? Who hasn’t sweet talked someone into giving them a lift a half hour out of their way? Who hasn’t  stuffed their face with macadamia nuts while leaving the peanuts for the peasants?

Getting something for nothing is one of the most exhilarating feelings life has to offer. It’s like cheating the laws of nature.  Newton’s first law for every action there is an equal but opposite reaction is suspended when you get something you absolutely do not deserve.

Now that we are the victims of an ailing economy, it’s time to hone this peccadillo called schnorring into a tool that can squeeze out advantage after advantage in an  otherwise hostile world.

“who knows what schnorring lurks in the hearts of men?  The Schnorrer knows!”