Editors' Choice, Schnorring »

[ Written By : Ed | Dec 31, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
New Year’s Resolution: More For ME!

Here we go again. Another year is almost over. For a lot of people it symbolizes a fresh start and a clean slate. In reality, January 1 is an entirely arbitrary date, but that has never stopped your friends or anyone else from waiting until now to make positive changes in their life.
But with everyone trying to make changes for the better, a natural support network can emerge. So why not help your friends along while making some changes of your own? This is a once a year opportunity to …

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[ Written By : Guest | Dec 29, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
Leverage Coffee for a Carne Asada ‘Chelada

You got this one; I get the next one. No, you get the . . . I’ll get . . . you get—STOP!
Next time you’re out with a friend or acquaintance leap at the first opportunity to treat them to a cup of coffee or a stale muffin from the day-old bin beside the register. In the politics of You Buy This, I Buy That, it’s important to establish that you’re neither a mooch nor a schnorr. Although of course, you’re both. But you must first establish yourself as generous, …

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[ Written By : Guest | Dec 27, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
Free Culture Now! Top Ten Schnorrer Gallery Opening Tips

Any urbane schnorrer regularly encounters the problem of sobriety, and is always on the lookout for places where a date will consider freeloading cultured rather than boorish. With these simple tips, you may never have to buy a glass of cheap wine again.
1: Consult the local rags
Most free weekly papers have a section for gallery listings. You want the “openings,” where poor schlubs hope that a case of Tecate and some Trader Joe’s cheese cubes will entice you to drop thousands on their post-pre-late-early-modernist drivel. A true schnorrer knows that …

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[ Written By : The Schnorrer | Dec 23, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
Putting The More In Smorgasbord

The Schnorrer’s Ten Commandments of Eating at a Smorgasbord
1– At the roast beef, turkey and pastrami carving board station, thou shalt always ask for more than one slice. 
2– When thou hast finished eating from your little cocktail plate, which now looketh disgusting from the fast-cngealing sauces, don’t go out of your way to find a place to put it down. Stick it anywhere on the smorgasbord table and goeth about your business.
3– Crudités are for amateurs (roughage is overrated anyway.) Thou shalt pass.
4– Wasteth not time on laying down a …

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[ Written By : Guest | Dec 20, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
The Rainy Day Schnorr

Winter solstice transcends all cultural divides and pulls people together to celebrate the more dismal part of the year. It’s important for us to remember: With the arrival of a challenge, so comes the arrival of opportunity.
I invite you to celebrate this year’s winter rainfall by using it as a chance to replenish your winter wardrobe. Here’s how:
1.)    Tune into with the weather-channel. Don’t just follow the dates, but focus on the hours and minutes of the traveling storms. Consider the rainstorm an accomplice;
2.)    Make plans to visit your friends …

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[ Written By : Ed | Dec 16, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
Whine Shop

Dear Schnorrer:
I recently returned a half empty, half full bottle of wine to my liquor store.  It wasn’t half bad and it wasn’t half good.  The clerk  refused to take it back and give me a store credit.  He argued that I must have had my way with it since it was half empty.  Most unsporting, I thought.  How do you suggest I handle such an episode, and I do plan on having many such episodes, in the future.
Louis De Palma
Dear Louis:
Don’t I know you from some place? 
The way I …

Beating the System, Editors' Choice, Featured, Schnorring »

[ Written By : Guest | Dec 15, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
Getting Something For Nothing At Work

If you are one of the millions of Americans who work a lackluster job with an evil boss, here are some ways to get back at The Man.
Follow these simple rules and you will feel more accomplished as a member of the work force.
WASTE TIME: Be late to everything, but not too late. Be slow to task, but not too slow. Shave a minute or two off everything you do. Pretend you are mentally vacant, but not totally retarded. The key is to keep the workday waning. The less time …

Beating the System, Editors' Choice, Featured, Looking for the Deal, Schnorring »

[ Written By : Michael | Dec 10, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
The Art of Haggling

Ladies and Gentlemen, these here are the tried and true rules of haggling.  We must express caution, as it will lead to excitement and adrenalin pumping through your body.
1.  Stop caring what people think of you.
Many people hesitate to haggle because they don’t want to seem cheap or argumentative. But are you really willing to pay top dollar just so you can preserve the esteem of total strangers? You’re only meeting them this once, and you’ll probably never meet them again.
Even if you’re shopping with people you know, they might …


[ Written By : The Schnorrer | Dec 9, 2010 ]Tell-a-Friend Tell-a-Friend Print This Post Print This Post
The Birth of a Schnorrer

Everyone is telling the Schnorrer these days about the resurgence of haggling:

How one reader uses haggling to save big bucks
How to haggle
You can negotiate anything
Negotiate once, save thousands every year
How I cut my Comcast cable bill by 33% (without losing any service)

 [The Washington Post: In tough economic times, shoppers take haggling to new heights].
The Schnorrer would like you to know that haggling started him on the Road to Schnorring before he was thirteen years old.  Just before he turned 13, just before he became bar mitzvahed, The Schnorrer’s  father took …