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[Jun 21, 2012 | No Comment]
10 Ways to Know You’re A Schnorrer, Volume 1

Free Stuffin is proud to present our readers with 10 Ways to Know You’re A Schnorrer.  No matter how you convince youself otherwise, if you perform any of these items, you are by definition A Schnorrer.
1. You fill up the 18 year old scotch bottle with Dewars so guests think they are getting the “fancy” stuff
2. You have 5 birthday dinners so that all your different groups of friends can “celebrate with you”
3. You know which neighbors have 2-ply toilet paper
4. You plan your “vacations” based on which friends or …

Beating the System, Headline »

[Nov 20, 2011 | No Comment]
Whole Foods Line Schnorring

My wife had purchased chicken for dinner to prepare at Whole Foods, and when she opened it, realized it was bad.  She sent me back to Whole Foods, and went straight up the customer service line, where there was one woman in front of me.  She returned a box of cereal, and the customer service rep asked if she would like cash back or exchange.  The woman said she would like to exchange for her order.
She then proceeded to ring up around 40 items worth over $250, applying the $5.49 …

Headline, Schnorring »

[Sep 25, 2011 | No Comment]
Cost-cutting at the Supermarket

Food prices are skyrocketing these days for normal Americans.   And for arugula-organic-free-range slaves like me, sticker shock is becoming a cardiac arrest.  So I’ve found a few creative ways to cut food costs at the supermarket.  And if done right, they won’t get you banned for life from your favorite store.
1)    Look for mold in the produce aisle.  While others look to make sure a box of strawberries is mold-free, I go for the ones with mold.  Then, after I’ve eaten all the good ones that day, I return the …

Headline, Schnorring, Shopping »

[Jul 6, 2011 | No Comment]
Beauty on the Cheap

Beauty is a billion-dollar industry aimed at convincing us we need to smell like roses when we sweat.  Women long have borne the yolk of L’Oreal and Calvin Klein, but now they have company.  Men used to be able to opt out, but no longer.  With the advent of manscaping, guys are expected to shell out as much dough as girls for the right to look and smell like every other metrosexual.
But beauty can be had on the cheap.  You don’t need expensive gym memberships, makeup or surgeries to be …

Headline, Schnorring, Tips From a Bartender »

[Jun 3, 2011 | No Comment]
Step-by-Step Guide to Getting Your Drinks Paid For

In a recession, we all need to make sacrifices, but come Hell or high water, I’m hanging onto my Friday nights out like those still hanging onto the glimmering hope of the Democrats digging us out of this mess. Until then, I choose sacrifices of a different breed. Girls, leave your hangups at the door: tonight, you’re drinking for free.
1. The Sad Bartender
It’s hard to believe, but some bartenders don’t think they’re “all that.” The best clubs may have bartenders that look like Abercrombie models, but hit up some of …

Counter-Schnorr, Headline »

[Apr 24, 2011 | No Comment]
How to Confront a Cheapskate

Even though our stated mission as a Schnorrer is to spend as little possible, we of necessity  will encounter others with the same mission. Yeah, I know that everyone does this but a cheapskate can go to extremes. Maybe for projects, it’s you who buys and gets everything. Or maybe its you who has to treat him/her every time you guys go to your restaurants, AND for it to be an expensive one too?
Here is an article showing a Schnorrer how to confront your cheapskate opponent and let him/her know …

Ask the Schnorrer, Headline »

[Apr 13, 2011 | No Comment]
The Foul Scented

Dear Schnorrer,
I have a good aquiantance who I am very fond of, except for one glaring fault.  How do you tell someone they smell bad?
Pepe
————————————-
Dear Pepe
With a name like Pepe, I can tell you are an expert on the topic of smelling bad.  Only kidding.  Unfortunately, with a name like Pepe, I doubt whether you can TAKE a joke.  Only kidding.
Now as to your friend: one tactic is to present your PAL with the gift of cologne.  A deodorant would be much too obvious so opt for subtleties like scented …

Beating the System, Headline »

[Apr 7, 2011 | 2 Comments]
How to Negotiate with a Street Vendor

One of my pet peeves is when the food cart vendors start hiking up their prices, and ripping me off.  I was more than willing to pay $1 for that snapple, but $1.25 is no longer an option.  Or the $2.25 hot dog.  They freakin pay no rent, so give me a break.
One thing that I’ve noticed is these vendors like to hoard change like it’s their crack stash.  Them giving out change is like breaking the code on street vendorship….it’s the 2nd commandment.  First one is never change the hot dog …

Ask the Schnorrer, Headline »

[Mar 30, 2011 | No Comment]
Unclean and Late

Dear Schnorrer:
I live with two roommates. One of my roommates has recently become very serious with her boyfriend, and he has gradually increased the time he has been spending at our apartment to the point where he only goes home to get more clothes. Otherwise, he is at our apartment every moment that he is not at work.
Would it be terribly rude of me to ask that he go back to his own apartment each morning to shower? He takes 30 minute showers, which a) leaves no more hot water …