My wife had purchased chicken for dinner to prepare at Whole Foods, and when she opened it, realized it was bad.  She sent me back toWhole Foods, and went straight up the customer service line, where there was one woman in front of me.  She returned a box of cereal, and the customer service rep asked if she would like cash back or exchange.  The woman said she would like to exchange for her order.
She then proceeded to ring up around 40 items worth over $250, applying the $5.49 credit …

Food prices are skyrocketing these days for normal Americans.   And for arugula-organic-free-range slaves like me, sticker shock is becoming a cardiac arrest.  So I’ve found a few creative ways to cut food costs at the supermarket.  And if done right, they won’t get you banned for life from your favorite store.
1)    Look for mold in the produce aisle.  While others look to make sure a box of strawberries is mold-free, I go for the ones with mold.  Then, after I’ve eaten all the good ones that day, I return the …

A California man on Dateline NBC’s “To Catch a Predator” showed up at a house in the suburbs, hoping to have sex with an underage girl he thought he had chatted with online. Instead, he found himself handcuffed and given a court date. When the date arrived, he skipped his hearing to try to have sex with another underage girl he thought he had chatted with online. He arrived at her suburban home and again found himself handcuffed.
What does this story tell the schnorrer? That sex predators are the ideal …

Beauty is a billion-dollar industry aimed at convincing us we need to smell like roses when we sweat.  Women long have borne the yolk of L’Oreal and Calvin Klein, but now they have company.  Men used to be able to opt out, but no longer.  With the advent of manscaping, guys are expected to shell out as much dough as girls for the right to look and smell like every other metrosexual.
But beauty can be had on the cheap.  You don’t need expensive gym memberships, makeup or surgeries to be …

In a recession, we all need to make sacrifices, but come Hell or high water, I’m hanging onto my Friday nights out like those still hanging onto the glimmering hope of the Democrats digging us out of this mess. Until then, I choose sacrifices of a different breed. Girls, leave your hangups at the door: tonight, you’re drinking for free.
1. The Sad Bartender
It’s hard to believe, but some bartenders don’t think they’re “all that.” The best clubs may have bartenders that look like Abercrombie models, but hit up some of …

A carefully executed couch surfing experience can provide a person with weeks, months and possibly years of food, lodging, entertainment and, done right, romance.
There are three basic approaches to the task of getting onto the couch or into a spare room.
1. Just Got Thrown out: This could be from a parent’s house, a girlfriend/boyfriend, stale roommate situation, or through an angry landlord. The crux of this approach (truthful or not) is that you are in a bind and need a temporary favor.
2. Just Passing Through: Won’t be here …

Even though our stated mission as a Schnorrer is to spend as little possible, we of necessity  will encounter others with the same mission. Yeah, I know that everyone does this but a cheapskate can go to extremes. Maybe for projects, it’s you who buys and gets everything. Or maybe its you who has to treat him/her every time you guys go to your restaurants, AND for it to be an expensive one too?
Here is an article showing a Schnorrer how to confront your cheapskate opponent and let him/her know …

Dear Schnorrer,
I have a good aquiantance who I am very fond of, except for one glaring fault.  How do you tell someone they smell bad?
Pepe
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Dear Pepe
With a name like Pepe, I can tell you are an expert on the topic of smelling bad.  Only kidding.  Unfortunately, with a name like Pepe, I doubt whether you can TAKE a joke.  Only kidding.
Now as to your friend: one tactic is to present your PAL with the gift of cologne.  A deodorant would be much too obvious so opt for subtleties like scented …

One of my pet peeves is when the food cart vendors start hiking up their prices, and ripping me off.  I was more than willing to pay $1 for that snapple, but $1.25 is no longer an option.  Or the $2.25 hot dog.  They freakin pay no rent, so give me a break.
One thing that I’ve noticed is these vendors like to hoard change like it’s their crack stash.  Them giving out change is like breaking the code on street vendorship….it’s the 2nd commandment.  First one is never change the hot dog …